I cried for half an hour straight. That doesn't seem like a long time, but every breath in that end-of-act-one tragedy gasp will leave you lightheaded. dependent on pretty voices for my calm and sanity.
1,053 files. photographs taken between June 2nd and November 9th. not to mention unfinished homework, poetry, college essays, and downloaded songs. lost. someone dropped the laptop, and i'm too stupid to have backed things up. somehow, in a way I couldn't understand, after hours on hold with tech support, it all came back. all of it.
but that span of panic, during which I thought I would not be able to apply to Cooper Union at all, made me realize how dependent on this stuff I am. It's just a little box that glows, but it contains a lot of my life. I need to start creating something tangible. Start building real things. This isn't the only reason I've been crying, but it's what I can explain, communicate somewhat simply without tearing myself apart. I love you. I'm going to go burn everything onto cd now.
Posted by samantha at November 11, 2004 11:17 AM